Another break from the blogging. Life is picking up, always seems to happen around October and Halloween. Then Birthday turmoil, Thanksgiving, list making for appropriate Christmas gifts, the semester ends in a flurry of grading, Santa pays a visit and before you've thrown away the wrapping paper and broken in your new slippers, the new year makes an appearance. The pace is too fast, but there's no way to stop it. I've also taken on the extra responsibility with my sister of planning a big party for my mom's birthday in December. Big parties are a lot of work and money. Yikes. Let me just say that if and when I get married, it's all about eloping. And that's a promise.

I've spent a lot of time thinking. Working it all out in my head, making sense of what's coming, putting my ducks in a row, that sort of thing. Mostly it's been about how I am going to deal with the Birthday. Twenty-seven isn't really such a big deal; at least it's not one of those traditionally dreaded birthdays like 30 or 50. However, birthdays in general are always a big deal for me. I relate the adding of another year to your age as a point of change and change of any kind, actually, is difficult for me to handle. I chalk it up to the fact that I moved around a lot as a kid. Anyhoo, I didn't handle 26 very well and don't want a repeat experience this year. I want to celebrate 27 in such a positive way that my happiness books would be proud. I want to emerge from November feeling super rather than disappointed.

Here's one result of all that thinking:

• I'm going to write a novel. Ambitious, yes. I want to take advantage of the fact that November is National Writing Month. I hope to compose (as close to) 50,000 words this month with the help of NaNoWriMo. See, I've always wanted to write fiction. I used to write when I was younger, then just fell out of the habit. Lately, though, for the past year or so, I feel like I need to write. I have a novel in me, floating around, somewhat formed, still a little hazy. I even started this blog as a way to get the writing juices flowing. Joining up with NaNoWriMo is an opportunity to explore this urge to write. I'm taking the chance that my writing will be utter crap and it very well could turn out that way, but it's better to find out, no? I can't let fear stop me from trying. To allow fear to immobilize me, especially around my birthday, would be just disastrous. I'm concerned that I don't have that motivation anymore. I haven't been able to muster up enough motivation to follow through on a number of goals I set for myself, so there is the worry that this project could fall through the cracks, too. I could be setting myself up for some major disappointment. But I could also be embarking on a most wonderful, satisfying experience. I need to test it out. I need to see what I can do.